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39758512e0
This is a recent conversion of an old IBM Mainframe application
to the fortune datafile format.
The "laws" were extracted from a S/370 Assembler program on a SHARE tape.
The comments in the program:
*---------------------------------------------------------------------*
* 'MURPHY' THE OLE PHILOSOPHER 18 AUGUST 1988 *
* *
* MURPHY WAS FOUND ON A JES2 TAPE OF ALL PLACES WITH ABOUT *
* 500 OR SO SAYINGS. GOT ANOTHER 250 FROM AN UNKNOWN SOURCE *
* AND HAVE ADDED ABOUT 100 OR SO MYSELF. *
* *
[list of changes omitted]
* *
* JIM MARSHALL, CAPT, USAF *
* (301) 688-6829 *
* *
*---------------------------------------------------------------------*
Fortunes that a sufficiently twisted mind could perceive as offensive
have been moved to murphy-o. Thanks to the submitter for reviewing
these fortunes.
The copyright issues were considered before approval.
PR: misc/8519
Submitted by: Cy Schubert (misc/8519)
Approved by: The Fortune Teller
27 lines
697 B
Plaintext
27 lines
697 B
Plaintext
%%$FreeBSD$
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You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.
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%
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When you're up to your nose in shit,
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be sure to keep your mouth shut.
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%
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One's life tends to be like a beaver's,
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one dam thing after another.
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%
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Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.
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%
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Old Scottish prayer: O Lord, grant that we may always be
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right, for thou knowest we will never change our minds.
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%
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All probabilities are 50%: either a thing will
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happen or it won't.
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This is especially true when dealing with women.
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Likelihoods, however, are 90% against you.
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%
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Sow your wild oats on Saturday night - then on
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Sunday pray for crop failure.
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%
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Early to rise and early to bed makes a male
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healthy and wealthy and dead.
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